… you can’t remember how to spell “IQ.”
… you can’t remember the number for 911.
… you just discovered your AM radio also works in the afternoon.
… you use correction fluid on your PC monitor.
… you fail Physical Education.
… you can not spell it.
… you try to turn the light on to find a flashlight in a power outage!
… you put braille on a drive up teller machine.
… you think Taco Bell is a Mexican phone company.
… you think a pigpen is something to write with!
… you think a cartoon is a song about automobiles.
… you use your CD-ROM unit as a drink holder.
… you frequently misspell your own name.
… you’ve ever been stuck in a toilet seat.
… you walk your kid to school because you’re in the same grade.
… it takes you two hours to watch 60 minutes.
… you often wonder who Ronald McDonald’s parents are.
… you sell your car for gas money.
… you think Hamburger Helper comes with a man.
… you try thinking and nothing happens.
… you think a quarterback is a refund!
… you think hot dogs are real meat.
… people nick-name you Homer.
… you cook Minute Rice for an hour!
… upon approaching a traffic sign that says STOP AHEAD, you reach over and grab your passenger by the top of the head.
… you lose $25 on a horse race and then lose $25 on the instant replay!
… you were the one testing out the shark bite suit.
… you get tangled up in a cordless phone.
… you need to be reminded to breath.
… someone tells you to call 911, and you can’t find the 11!
… you take a donut back cause it has a hole on it!
… you stare at an orange juice can because it says concentrate.
… you have to look “stupid” up in the dictionary.
… you sit on the T.V. and watch the couch.
… you tell your wife not to laugh as you point a gun to your head, because she is next!
… you think Yogi Bear played for the Yankees.
… you bronze a gold medal as a keep sake.
… you get lost in your closet.
… you take an I.Q. test and forget to write your name.
… you go around a revolving door looking for the door knob.
… you list the police department as a reference on your resume.
… you get fired from volunteer work.
… a hamburger is a cheeseburger, hold the cheese, to you.
… you run around looking for a quarter to call 911.
… you can’t find the “ANY” key on the keyboard.
… you feel for one millisecond that you may have won the sweepstakes this time despite the fact that it is stamped in clear view “bulk rate.”
… you try to look up a word in the dictionary without knowing how to spell it correctly, and you can’t find it. Feeling like a “genius”, that you realize that WEBSTER’S DICTIONARY made an error.
… if it takes you an hour to make minute rice.
… you have to look on both ends to open a bottle.
… someone offers you a bagel and you reply, “No thanks, I already have a dog!”
… you turn the light on to see if it’s dark.
… you take your chia pet for a walk.
… you wear your glasses while looking for them.