Little old lady?
Little old lady who?
Where did you learn how to yodel?
Little old lady?
Little old lady who?
Where did you learn how to yodel?
A man sets out to find work as a lumberjack. The last available slot is in the middle of the desert. Then the man meets the manager and gets the tour, but when they are finished the manager says: The only bad part of this job is that there is not one woman around for 200 miles.” This worried the man as to how he would be able to fulfill his sensual pleasures without any women around. So he asks this question to the manager, and the manager says: “I’m not supposed to tell you this, but about a half mile to the east there is a special tree called the Tree of Pleasure. Stick your rod in there and you will find all the pleasure you need.”
For the next three days, the man does this, and each time has awesome pleaure. On the fourth day, nothing happens. The man goes to the manager and says, “What’s the deal?” The manager says: “Oh, I forget to tell you, today its your turn to sit in the tree.”
Q: What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A: It’s cute but can you breath out of it?
Two strangers are sitting in adjacent seats in an airplane. One guy says to the other, “May we talk? … I hear that the flight will go faster if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.”
The other guy, who had just opened a good book, closes it slowly, takes off his glasses and asks, “What would you like to discuss?”
The first guy says, “Oh, I don’t know; how about Nuclear Power?”
The other guy says, “OK, that could make for some pretty interesting conversation. But let me ask you a question first … A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff, but the deer excretes pellets, the cow excretes big patties, and the horse excretes clumps of dried grass … Why is that?”
The first guy says, “Gee, I don’t know.”
The other guy says, “Oh? … Well then, do you really think you’re qualified to discuss Nuclear Power when you really don’t know shit?”
There was an airplane and three men were inside. One had a $5 bill, the other a brick, and the other a bomb.
The first man, with the brick, dropped it down on the town below. All the people below shouted, “The sky is falling!”
Then the man with the $5 bill dropped it. All the people shouted, “Its raining money!”
Then the man w/ a bomb dropped it. They heard no anwser. Then, they jumped out to see what happened. They talked to a scared looking old lady, who said “I was walking, and I farted, and then, the man behind my blew up!”
Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring …
Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring … Ring …
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Thank you for calling Technical Support.
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