Bumper Snickers

Constipated people don't give a crap.

Practice safe sex, go screw yourself.

Please tell your pants it's not polite to point.

If that phone was up your butt, maybe you could drive a little better.

Thank you for pot smoking.

If at first you don't succeed ... blame someone else and seek counseling.

Impotence: Nature's way of saying, "No Hard Feelings".

If you can read this, I've lost my trailer.

The earth is full - Go home

I have the body of a God ... Buddha

So many pedestrians - So little time

Cleverly disguised as a Responsible Adult

Honk if anything falls off

He who hesitates is not only lost ... but miles from the next exit

Where are we going and why am I in this handbasket?

I haven't lost my mind, it's backed up on disk somewhere

Body by Nautilus; Brain by Mattel

Boldly going nowhere

Don't be sexist - Broads hate that

Heart attacks ... God's revenge for eating His animal friends

Honk if you've never seen an Uzi fired from a car window

How many roads must a man travel down before he admits he is lost?

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets

Saw it ... Wanted it ... Had a fit ... Got it!

WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition.