1. It’s just as much fun by yourself.
2. If you split up with your partner, they won’t spread malicious rumours about the size of your vocabulary.
3. It can be done in public.
4. The cops can’t trace you if you verbally abuse someone – usually.
5. A little one can be just as good as a big one.
6. No one gets jealous if you do it to a lot of people at the same time.
7. You won’t be ridiculed if you do it to someone of the same sex.
8. You can meet a stranger and have them doing it to you three seconds later.
9. It’s much more acceptable at family reunions. Hopefully.
10. If it comes and goes quickly it’s not a bad thing.
11. If you lose it in your old age, you won’t be disappointed.
12. No one spreads rumours about how easy you are to swear at.