Category: Relationships

A very elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary.

The old man leans forward and softly says to his wife, “Dear, there is something that I must ask you. It has always bothered me that our 10th child never quite looked like the rest of our children. Now, I want to assure you that these 75 years have been the most wonderful experience I could have hoped for, and your answer cannot take that away. But I must know, did he have a different father?”

The wife drops her head, unable to look her husband in the eye. She paused for a moment, then she said, “Yes, yes he did.”

The old man was shaken. The reality of what his wife was admitting hit him harder than he expected.

With a tear in his eye, he asked, “Who?, Who was he? Who was the father?”

Again, the old woman drops her head, saying nothing at first, as she tried to muster the courage to tell her husband the truth.

Then, finally, she says, “You.”

A man appears before a judge one day, asking for a divorce. The judge quietly reviews some papers and then says, “Please tell me why you are seeking a divorce.”

“Because,” the man says,”I live in a two-story house.”

The Judge replies, “What kind of a reason is that? What is the big deal about a two-story house?”

The man answers, “Well Judge, one story is ‘I have a headache’ and the other story is ‘It’s that time of the month.'”

At school Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the whole truth.”

Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. He goes home, and as he is greeted by his mother he says, “I know the whole truth.” His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, “Just don’t tell your father.”

Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, “I know the whole truth.” The father promptly hands him $40 and says, “Please don’t say a word to your mother.”

Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying,
“I know the whole truth.”

The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, “Then come give your real father a big hug.”

A fellow in a bar notices a woman, always alone, who comes in on a fairly regular basis.

After the second week, he made his move. “No thank you,” she said politely.”

“This may sound rather odd in this day and age, but I’m keeping myself pure until I meet the man I love.”

“That must be rather difficult,” the man replied.

“Oh, I don’t mind too much,” she said. “But, it has my husband pretty upset.”