**When you take a long time, you’re slow.
When your boss takes a long time, he’s thorough.
**When you don’t do it, you’re lazy.
When your boss doesn’t do it, he’s too busy.
**When you make a mistake, you’re an idiot.
When your boss makes a mistake, he’s only human.
**When doing something without being told, you’re overstepping your authority.
When your boss does the same thing, that’s initiative.
**When you take a stand, you’re being bull-headed.
When your boss does it, he’s being firm.
**When you please your boss, you’re ass kissing.
When your boss pleases his boss, he’s being co-operative.
**When you apply for leave, you must be going for an interview.
When your boss applies for leave, it’s because he’s overworked.