Eve and God

One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, “Lord, I have a problem!”

“What’s the problem, Eve?”

“Lord, I know you’ve created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but I am just not happy.”

“Why is that, Eve?” came the reply from above.

“Lord, I’m lonely and missing something. And I’m sick to death of apples.”

“Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you.”

“What’s a man, Lord?”

“This man will be a flawed creature, with aggressive tendencies, an enormous ego and an inability to empathize or listen to you properly. All in all, he’ll give you a hard time. But, he’ll be bigger and faster and more muscular than you. He’ll be really good at fighting and kicking a ball about and hunting fleet-footed ruminants, and not altogether bad in the sack.”

“Sounds great,” says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebow.

“Yeah, well, he’s better than a poke in the eye with a blunt stick. But you can have him on one condition.”

“What’s that, Lord?”

“You’ll have to let him believe that I made him first.”

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