Did you hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of lawyers?
He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren’t met.
Lawyer Crosses the Road
Why did the lawyer cross the road?
To get to the car accident on the other side.
God vs. Lawyer
What is the difference between God and a lawyer?
God doesn’t think he’s a lawyer.
Legal Word Processor
Have you heard about the lawyers’ word processor?
No matter what font you select, everything come out in fine print.
Lawyers and a Bus
How many lawyers does it take to stop a moving bus?
Never enough.
Drowning Lawyer
How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?
Shoot him before he hits the water.
Lawyer in a Tree
How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
Cut the rope.
Legal Afterlife
How can you tell there’s an after life for lawyers?
Because after they die, they lie still.
Lawyer at the Beach
What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
Not enough sand.
Shark Attack
Why won’t sharks attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy.