Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two, one to stand on the ladder and hold the bulb, and one to turn the ladder.
Tag: One-Liner
Masturbation and Procrastionation
Q: What do masturbation and procastionation have in common?
A: Both feel great at first, but then you realize your just screwing yourself.
Yo Mamma
Yo Mamma is so stupid she fell out the window and went up.
Fairy Tales
Q: Whats the difference between Northern fairy tales and Southern fairy tales?
A: Northern fairy tales begin with, “Once apon a time
Pop Star
Q: How do you make a duck into a singer?
A: Put it in the microwave until it’s BILL WITHERS!
You So Small!
You’re so small you slam dunk your bus fair!
Roadkill Blonde
One day Mr. Smith saw his blonde neighbor walk past his house with tire tracks on her back. He asked, “What happened to you?”
“Well” she said, ” the sign said do not walk so I crawled across the street and a car ran over me.”
England
Q: Why were there 10 million people at the 10th of January in England?
A: Because They have their home their!
How do you identify a Bald Eagle?
Q: How do you identify a bald eagle?
A: Its feathers are combed to one side.
Mike Tyson in Bed
Q: Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
A: Mace will do that to you!